RAPE is a CRIME, nothing less

RAPE has been legalised in this country! As in the minimal years of sentencing these criminal isn't enough, they can get away "scot-free" because they are either young first-time offender, cooperated with the police, shown remorse, had not been "very much older" than the minor and guarantee not to commit such offence again.

Over and over again, we read and listened and are exposed to news about women and children being raped around the globe. Over and over again, people are being educated that rape is a 'crime', and thus focus should be on the criminal, and not on the victim for the way they dress, they way they act for NO ONE ask to be raped!

As in the crime itself is not heinous enough, here in Malaysia - criminals are bound over for THEIR good behaviour. Definitely makes you wonder what kind of law there are (which are actually effective), to protect the victims in this country.

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Case 1: A former national youth squad bowler NOOR AFIZAL AZIZAN was bound over for RM25,000 to be of good behavior for five years after he pleaded guilty to the statutory rape of a 13-years-old girl. 

Reason given by the Court of Appeal? He was 19 at the time of the offence, had not been "very much older" than the minor he had consensual sex with, had cooperated with the police, shown remorse, and guarantee that he would not commit such an offence again.

 # Question 1: Is 13-years-old OLD ENOUGH to give consensual sex and able to understand the outcome or result surrounding it? This girl is STILL a CHILD!

 # Question 2: Doesn't being "older" make him understand and realize the situation he's in MUCH BETTER?

 # Question 3: Does his "guarantee" actually warranted anything at all?

 # Question 4: If I stabbed a person, and I plead guilty, and that person allowed me to stab him/her, I cooperated with the police, shown remorse, and guarantee that I will not commit such thing again, will I too be freed?

 # And while the court has defended their decision, saying it has nothing to do with him being someone with power (even little), this decision proves to be rather suspicious, isn't it?

 # Will the court actually still have him bound over if she's their own daughter?

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Case 2: A 22-years-old Electrician has been bound over on a good behaviour bond for RM25,000 to be of good behaviour for 3 years after being found guilty to the statutory rape of a 12-years-old girl and 10 months. 

Apparently, the court took into consideration that CHUAH GUAN JIU was a young, first-time offender, consensual sexual act, being a school dropout and HIS future.

The most interesting part are the details of this case which I listed below:

1. DPP Lim Cheah Yit said Chuah had coaxed the girl into skipping school and following him back to his flat on the pretext of him being sick.

2. "She asked him many times to take her to school but he said he was unwell and took her to his home," Lim had said when pressing for deterrent sentence.

3. Counsel Yusuf Idris said his client earned RM30 a day and was staying with his parents and a younger sibling.

4. "This is his first offence. He has a fixed job now and many years ahead of him," he said.

5. Yusuf said his client has repented and urged the court not to impose a custodial sentence in view of Chuah's age.

# Again, a girl who is still very much a child. Can she really consent to sex? 

# From the content of the case, it is highly understood that he has every intention to rape her (so what's so consensual about this?)

 # Does earning RM30 a day as well as staying with parents indirectly caused a person to have an urge to rape, or more precisely, why do that has anything to do with his own decision to rape?

 # Being a first-offender nor a school dropout DO NOT suggest that he will not do it again nor the fact that he do not realize the consequences of his action.

 # Age of a criminal has nothing to do with the crime he commit!!

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It sure looks like our Malaysia Courts are lacking funds, else I can't see any reason why these two criminals are allowed to be in the society without any punishment to remind them that what they did is more than wrong, it's heinous. The fact that they are both adults (over the age of 18-years-old) and are more than capable in finding someone of eligible age for sex, speaks volume for their action. 

Despite that offence under Section 376(1) of the Penal Code carries a maximum jail sentence of 20 years and whipping, the fact that I have NEVER throughout these years notice that rapists are punished for more than 10 years shown how little the law cares to protect their very citizens.

I'm not even disappointed anymore, I'm DISGUSTED. Disgusted with the system. Disgusted with the law. Disgusted with this country. Disgusted with the fact that while nothing is being done about all this, the government/politicians are more concerned about protecting their asses with Section 114A of the Evidence Act of 1950 - which very existence is just to stop the citizens from finding out their dirty works in the ministry - just another ISA.

Malaysia declared as one of the safest countries in ASEAN. Seriously?

I find this piece of news extremely disturbing, as well as misleading to our own citizens and others. Perhaps the government want to create some sort of appeal to tourists, investors...  but to announce that we are one of the safest, is another level of bullshit all together.

If Malaysia is safe, why there has been a recent hike of cases report in the media - where women were stabbed and robbed in broad daylight?

If Malaysia is safe, why people are killed and kidnapped over a mere hundreds to several thousands Ringgit?

If Malaysia is safe, why crimes rates have steadily drastically increased over a span of several years?

If Malaysia is safe, how is it that the same robbers in my area are not caught up until today? It has been more than a year, to say the least. And amusingly, almost every single house in this area has been robbed at least once by the same people. So if Malaysia is safe, what are these issues?

People are getting desperate these days, with poor economy as well as rising living expenses. People are to be blamed as well, for feeding on their wants towards luxury lives, as encouraged by media and corporates alike.

People are kidnapped and ransom, even for a mere several thousands of Ringgit. Killed even. How about rates of crimes committed against women these days? They are targeted for their vulnerability where rapes and many other crimes continue to escalate. 

Problem with these robbers in Malaysia - they rob more than just cash. They robs their victims' lives as well. Do you even hear of robbers just taking cash and snatching stuffs then leave? They stab and slash you before you can react. COLD BLOODED ANIMALS on the prowl. That's what they are. And our government can't seem to stop them. Why is that the case?

Are policemen not motivated even enough to protect the citizens? If so, then why are they even hired as policemen to begin with? And to say the least, sometimes the police themselves are the criminal instead!

We, the people in Malaysia, are living our lives in fear... unable to trust the police, unable to trust the government, unable to trust our neighbours, nor even friends. It's a sad time indeed for everyone. Thus I'm not at all surprised to notice how people are turning colder and hostile towards one another.

Government should revamp the laws. Laws are to be updated as civilizations evolved. But what are laws if they are not enforced? Noticed how often some things always end up stopped half-way (be it building development, laws... ) because nothing is enforced for the long term?

I don't really give a damn about the politics, as long as the people will at least be protected at all times. Corrupt all the hell you want, but at least do something right!

Malaysia. Safe. Yeah right.

Ignorance or Naive?

History repeats. And it's proven yet again, how parents failed their duty to protect their children. And somehow, this is incredibly rampant in Asian countries with the lukewarm effort to improve the system or even putting up any effort into it.

Take Malaysia for example. The recent missing child Nurul Nadirah Abdullah, whose charred remains was found at a plantation. It's a typical horror event that somehow always repeat itself in the news. And as always, it shares two points. Point 1: Young children wander about without adult surveillance. 2) Parents said their area is safe.

I wonder how many children need to be lost, hurt, or killed in order for parents in Malaysia to learn about "child safety". Malaysian community have a typical attitude in life. A "tidak apa" behavior which you can see in the way they live as a family within any community, in their performance at work and literally everything itself. Malaysians make a huge fuss and fights when things go wrong... though this usually only last for, say... a few days? Weeks? Months? Years? And then the whole issue will die down and repeat itself once again when things happen, yet again. Malaysian never "prevent", they only "react".

The most Malaysian parents have almost no rules or regulations for their children which I believed, an attitude ingrained in them since long ago, a very cultural thing. Children ran on the streets where vehicles passes by all day. Younger siblings will be placed in the care of the older siblings, sometimes as young as SEVEN-years-old. Parents and community are too comfortable with the idea that "it is all in the hands of Allah or the Lord". Unfortunately, some communities are affected more on this particular topic than any other, mainly because they are very trusting to others - which make them one of the most close-knitted community who look out for one another. However they must realize that the current society that we are living in has since changed much. Crimes has increased drastically. The violence and senselessness of the crimes these days should serve as loud warning bell in any parents mind. Parents who commit heinous crimes against their own children are in the rising and even reported quite often in the news, how can you expect people in the public will not harm someone's else child? So is this "naive" or just plain "ignorance"?

Over and over again, parents have been reminded to look and monitor their children. Over and over again, children are left to their own devices. And when bad things happened, parents and the public cried foul over the crime and want justice. Yet, they are just as guilty. They could have prevent the crime from happening all-together.

If parents are not able to learn on their own devices, it is big time that a proper law to be put in place. A law to ensure that the parents are fit to care for their children, and harsher laws for crime against children. It is laughable that a monster who molest, rape, hurt, abduct are only sentenced to a few years for such crime, only to repeat himself on other children when he's out. Where is the justice in this?

The Issue of Self-Harm

I really need to do some clarifications here. Families and friends are getting worried with my revelation of self-harm issue and have been approaching me. Yes, I have a tendency to have suicide-thoughts and harming myself in the process. Of course, there are some people who says it's attention-seeking behavior (which I will deny, I get attention no matter what I do and getting attention on this issue, is just not me) and tonnes of other things. Though when I think of it deeper, I did find myself questioning, "Did I really do this for attention?". After much thought, I decided that 'attention-seeking' is indeed part of the subconscious want of it, despite my conscious self deny it strongly.

Honestly, I have long since accepted this dark side of me that craves to hurt myself or to just die and let go of life itself. I have never given much thought on this side of me till mid-last year, where I took part of a seminar in the name of work. It made me realizes that I actually do fear that I will really get myself killed one-day, and that somewhat forces me to look deeper into my subconscious.

Funnily, it all started when I was 7 or 8 years old. I remembered that I was extremely upset about something and it prompted me to write a suicide letter in my notebook. I didn't do anything then. But over the years, I done many different things to kill myself which only ends with hilarious results (even I made myself speechless and laughed about it whenever I thought of it).

There was this time where I close all windows and doors in the kitchen I use cloth to cover each and any openings, then leave the gas on (all while at the same time praying no one will press the doorbell as I didn't want an explosion). Within 30 minutes, I got so fed-up of waiting for myself to die that I close the gas and open all windows and doors to let the air out. Then I went back to the TV to ease my boredom.

Another occasion, I opened the railing and window of my room and climbed on. While I was preparing to jump, the logic side of the brain kicks in. "My room is only ONE floor high. If I jumped off and only ends up with some bruises and scars, I will have to get back in the house through the front gate. And mum is downstairs." So I got off, close the window and went back to my study.

I too forced myself to swallowed a dozen over Panadols before sleep one day only to ends up with major headaches for the next few days. I totally avoid Panadol since then, unless I'm having major illness.

While I was renting room in college days, my bed on the upper deck is just next to the ceiling fan. If I stretch myself far out enough, I definitely be able to touch it. In more than one occasion, I had this strong curiosity of wanting to touch the fan while it was spinning - just so to see what would happen. But the thought of splattered blood, pain and possibly losing my hand while still being alive as well scarring my poor roommate for life stops me. Then I will fall fast asleep.

Once, I was way prepared to crash my car but the monetary side said, "The car is worth more than RM50,000 and when you die, your funeral will cost as much. Better keep the car for its value to pay for your death." So I stopped myself once again.

And of course, you guys know the part where I slit my wrist more than thrice and all. For the record, I KNOW that I can't die from the blood lost from the wrist. Unless I cut some major arteries, which is not possible as I don't slit that hard. Also, there are 5 stages of blood lost trauma which so far I've only experienced the first stage. In order to die, you need to reach the fourth or the last stage. So, if anyone you know tried to suicide with wrist slitting attempt, there are only two explanations to it. Either they don't know how to cut themselves the right way OR they just want attention and calling for help.

I could still bloody go on, but even I'm bored of writing my attempts. I noticed that whenever I have an emotional outbursts or something happened that caused me to be extremely unhappy about life, I will attempt whatever possible. I consider it as my weakness of being unable to face life as it is. It's a mental issue in its very own way. I've considered and tried to find some help by trying to located local psychiatrist (with no luck). Though I do consider myself lucky, in the sense that I know that it is a problem that need fixing. I believe that when one realized there is an issue and do something about it, even if it can't be resolved, it can at the very least be controlled.

Time flies - so here comes baby MARCH

It's the first week of March now, and I'm obligated to write something or anything at all - just so to show that I'm alive. I've been pretty hard to get in touch with these past few weeks - no thanks to hopeless DiGi line in my area, as well as really bad Maxis internet line. Going bonkers... but TOTALLY TOTALLY love the "alone" time.

As I am prone to depression, I must note that I was really down in the dumps for a few times. And yeah, did some self-harm but chill, it's nothing close to "death". I actually went to research on the self-harm things that I did to myself, and it's interesting to note that most self-harm are just done to create a sort of "sensation" or reassuring own-self that I am still alive. So no worry, I won't die anytime soon - especially not from self-harm for I have no courage to literally kill myself. Even though I went through days and days of mental planning of death but nothing really interests me. Especially when I want a clean, quick death if I'm to die at home so family wouldn't need to clean-up after me - or a quick, noticeable death is I'm to die outside without being a hindrance to public... just so people can find my body. Yes, it ain't easy to die... especially on these terms of mine! So it won't and will not happen.

So anyway, let's slap those "death" topic away and get into some other weird topic here. It just came out of the blue when I was bathing this morning, and recalling some movies and all. I'm not exactly sure that any of you notice this but there is some very specific "life stories" or topics if you look into the type of dramas, movies made by different races or cultures.

I mean, think about it.

Malay dramas, movies - If it's about ghost, it's far from scary. It's amazingly humorous and doesn't really make sense. Perhaps I don't really get their scary scene as most ghost stories are related to specific culture and believes. On their dramas and movies, mostly tend to focus on how women (especially married) should behave with their husbands, or practice religion vigorously, or how they should be accepting to their husbands having second, third or forth wives without creating a scene as it is sinful (seriously?). Noticed that it usually about family affairs. Sad to note that a number of Malays drama on the tv seriously, can't make it... with the bad storyline or "super-fail" acting. Those really good ones though can get you glued to the chairs. Indonesia's dramas/movies on the other hand, I noticed they are really quite good - maybe because since it already make it out of the country so the bad ones may be kicked aside by then.

Chinese dramas, movies - If it's about ghost, usually ranges from DAMN scary to DAMN hilarious. On TVB (Hong Kong) dramas and movies, quite often it focus on family affairs such as siblings or relatives fighting over properties, or revenge for their family... generally I term them as bad influence (with their extreme mind-blowing underhand tactics) - though sometimes some are more hilarious in nature. Or, it will be generally some remake of successful English dramas - some FAIL while some are quite close to being GREAT. Taiwanese dramas/movies tend to be extremely LONG (especially their Hokkien dialects dramas which one famously known to run over 500 episodes) but they do have quite interesting talk shows. Singapore dramas/movies are quite good (most likely because we relate to it) but you do get bored with the same actors and actresses in all their shows. China dramas/movies are long-winded as well, and usually are more educational and infused with morale values in general.

Indian dramas, movies - I've NEVER seen a ghost related indian movie - now that I'm thinking about it. Yeah, never. Something that I notice about Hindi movies - stories are usually about parents against marriage, revenge etc etc but always with TWO thing in common. First, they can fight ONE man against 20 dudes with parangs (more impressive than IP Man). Second, they always have tonnes of trees to sing and run around and changes more than 3 times in ONE singing scene that last for 5 minutes or so. Local Indian dramas FAIL to make any noticeable presence to me.

English dramas, movies - Their ghost movies are USUALLY boring (only a few make it to the SCARY level) and again, I must say it's related to culture and believes. As they are the largest entertainment industry, the type of dramas and movies covered are so varied, that there just isn't much to comment about. As they are running out of ideas, we tend to see remakes or part II, part III etc. Occasionally they make their own translation of some successful international movies which often fail to project the same success.

Japan dramas, movies - My only recollection are mostly of ghost movies. And man, they can really make BLOODY scary ones. I still remember "Dark Water" till today, and houses or hotels with black patches of waters on the walls or ceiling, still creeps me right out.

Korean dramas, movies - Did not notice any ghost dramas/movies. Usually it's on the older times about laws, regulations, customs... or love stories, which they are so famously known for. I'm a sucker to their dramas shows as it can be funny, sad all at the same time - with gorgeous actors and actresses, of course!

Now, what did I miss out? I notice that I'm quite long-winded when I start writing as well... not sure it's a good or bad thing but man... I know this post especially, contains tonnes of grammatical errors - please pardon me.

Writer's Block

There are several topics that I wanted to write about badly but... it's kinda driving me crazy that words don't come as it should or even, the emotion needed for these writing just go... poof! Or haywire. Argh!

I want to talk about "Self-Harm" issue. A topic that is personally quite close to the heart. Especially when I went through websites and articles talking about these.

Or that KFC workers incident. That really makes me blow my freaking top off, as I noticed since school days how some MELAYU (not Islam or Muslim) people these days behaves as though the world owe shits to them.

And also the break-in incidents at my place here that are happening every one or two days by the freaking same group of FOUR that has yet to be caught because the policemen are fucking useless to begin with.

Now, three darn topics that I can't write properly. How bloody annoying is that!

Heh

All that reading of books and mangas and businesses...

It's all taking their toll. And also, the nags and life and everything. Heh.

The Battle

Dragonlance spoke of a battle

That rages on within Steel Brightblade

Tore him apart with that of

Light by his father, Sturm Brightblade

And darkness by his mother, Kitiara Majere.

A battle within that fought for his choice

And those of his parents guidance.

A battle we all know too well

Even in our own life shells.

Each of us knows what’s within,

And yet at the same time we hears

Other voices guiding us to a path,

A path that we longed for deep within.

Sometimes these voices helps,

Sometimes these voices breaks,

Whether with good or dark intents we could never tell.

We fought to hear it,

We tried hard to listen,

But often this voice deep within

Is lost among the noises outside.

Sometimes you find it,

Sometimes you don’t.

Along the way you notice

That you have given up looking

‘Cos it doesn’t matter anymore.

Torn we are like Steel Brightblade

A battle to listen to ourselves

And those to listen to our parents.

Of course not all parents mean harm to their child

Just sometimes it is unintentional

Done to protect the child

That they have brought into this world.

I was told it’s easy

For it is never hard to listen

And do what you need to do

For the pain caused will not be long

Once they see how you succeed.

But I find it hard to do

“Easier said than done” rings in my mind

My spirit crumbles

Torn into little pieces trying to find the path

The path that will lead the heart

To where it has always longed to go.

Oh how I wish and pray and hope

But I know that deep inside

This battle will never truly end

All I ever need now is to be like Steel Brightblade

He who found his side of the battle

Fought for that of his believe

That is one man I truly respect

Even though he’s born of fiction itself.

Tears of a Lost Child

She looked to her left,

Then she looked to her right.

Her fears rise up,

From her stomach to her chest,

And soon her panic hits her mind.

Her breath quicken,

Her heart-beats tripled,

Her sight became a blur,

And within seconds the dam overflows.

Frighten like a lost kitten,

Frighten like a rat caught in a trap.

Tears that started flowing

Just wouldn’t stop pouring,

Despite her silent plea,

It just kept going.

This poor child is lost,

Lost in the streets,

There were turnings to her left and right,

And even some roads to the front and back.

Yet here she stands crying,

For the lost she felt

Seems more than that of a child,

A child who lost her way in the crowd.

Her teary eyes cry silently for help,

For she tried to speak but only sobs came out.

Thus she pleads for help from a passing man,

Who notice nothings but what he will gains

Without looking at her, he said

“Fault not on me for not helping,

Fault on you for not knowing.”

She passes several more on their way

They too said the very same thing,

Telling her that it’s merely her fate

To lost her way the way she did.

With a heavy heart and a wavering strength,

She ventured on the route ahead.

She saw her loved ones at one end,

Laughing and crying at the same time

With worry lines etched unto their faces,

She knew in her broken heart

She causes them pain more than they can admit.

Unable to take the scene no more,

This teary child stumbles on.

With tears clouding her way,

She hears her companions asking around

On the path ahead and the choices they had

With courage and strength they went on ahead.

She smiled upon hearing them

Her heart silently prayed for them on their journey,

For even if she lost hers

She wouldn’t want them to lose theirs.

She lifts her feet

One ahead of another,

Threw her head back

And look toward the heavens,

Taking a deep breath

Over the passing breeze.

The tears has stopped

The heart has slowed,

She smiled knowing she has found her way.

A way which may have caused a lot of tears,

Yet she knows tears too will give way to smiles.

This lost child who has cried too many

Of tears for herself and those around her,

Her tears has stopped and though she smiled,

She knew her way will causes many to tears

But she knew these tears will not be forever.

After all, a lost child who has cried along this painful way,

Has found her way to stop her tears,

Tears has given way to smiles

For this lost child has found her way

To stop the tears from ever coming back again.

Tiger Mum vs. Tigger Mum

An interesting topic in the Sunday Star. And yet a topic strangely familiar to all, regardless of whether you are a parent or young adults – as this topic is definitely one that everyone can relates to from any walks of life.

It’s understandable that the Western people voices (or quite literally, “scream”) over their dissatisfaction of this Tiger Mum’s way of raising her children, and at the same time condemn many quarters – from education to the Western way of raising their children. And yet, for people like me whose grew up in a Chinese family (but I must state, mine is pretty much liberal), this is nothing to be upset or to caused an uproar for. And in fact, as upsetting as some of her statements are, this Tiger Mum’s statements aren’t that far from truth.

Let’s look at this. I must admit that some of her ways - such like pushing her kids beyond the limits in practicing their skills to belittling them are NOT the right way to treat the children. But then again, certain disciplines or even punishments are needed to guide kids to the right path. While her ways are very extreme, you can’t deny that it pushes her kids to over-achieve themselves.

While Tigger Mum was at first, intimidated with all the news surrounded this Tiger Mum and her book, she too can’t help but agree on certain things about children these days. I’m not a mum at all, yet I notice how kids to teenagers these days, are all pushing the limits of their parents and at the same time being hard-headed, selfish and rude. I don’t FULLY blame these kids / teenagers for misbehaving. I blame their parents in failing to teaching their children from wrong to right.

I have seen the Western way of up-bringing during my travels (and I’m not IMPRESSED, to say the least), and I also noticed how the media influences the present Asians in up-bringing their kids in the so-called “western way”. Mind you, I don’t fully detest the Western way of bringing-up their children. I must say that I was impressed with some parents, that while they do not hit their children, they are able to impose punishments to discourage bad behaviors. Yet, I’m seeing less of that – and more on pampering the kids to the max and just literally, let them have their way. And yes, I am very much blaming the media on that for these are the exact message sent out from movies, advertisements and more.

So anyway, let’s look at some of these examples that I’ll be sharing here based on real-life experiences of my own and shared by fellow friends. Here I will list these kids (and teenagers) of their races – just to prove my point that this happens to all races, without being racist.

Story 1: My family with my grandma (except for me) went for a holiday in UK visiting my sisters. I was told by my grandma that while she was climbing up the stairs to my sis’ apartment, a white kid threw cans at her and sniggered “You yellow skin don’t belong here!” from inside his home. Even when my mum and dad followed from behind her, he continued with his truant and showed his tongue then went back in to his TV (I assume). My grandma was very upset and I feel for her. She was almost 90 years old then.

Story 2: While at the UK airport, my family witnesses yet another outrageous (and amusing, for me) another scene. A young white boy (no more than 5 years old) threw his tantrum in public by literally stomping on the ground, had his back on the floor, kicked, wailed and glided his butt around. Yes, every single parent’s nightmare of a scene. And these white people who were around actually commented, “Oh my, that boy is so cute!” while smiling from ear to ear watching him. Excuse me but, what is so CUTE about a kid throwing his tantrum in public and mentally abusing his parents?

Story 3: My aunt and her family has been in UK since her marriage and even worked until they own and manage their own restaurant. One day, my uncle caught a white teenager stealing from his shop which he gave chase on. He too, grabbed unto a baseball bat trying to scare this teenager from ever returning to steal again. But, the teenager did return only with his attorney and the police. While he admits to being a thief, he also sued my uncle for intending to cause him harm with the baseball bat. I must say I’m IMPRESSED with their protection laws over the children.

Story 4: A family friend was initially residing somewhere in Europe (I’m guessing, New Zealand) with her husband and her toddler son. While she was out walking with her son in his stroller, they stopped by a café for tea. Somehow, her son misbehaved and she slapped his hand and told him to behave. Then a white lady, who was nearby scolded her, “Don’t do that to a child! You will cause him to have a possible impairment for the rest of his life!” over his palm being slapped. Wow.

While I am amazed with the Whites (Americans, British – all ‘guai lohs’ in general) in up-bringing their kids with the highest self-regard and self-belief, however when it comes to matter of disciplining or righting the wrongs done and even educating their kids – they failed miserably in my eyes.

Perhaps it’s their culture, and definitely it’s their “over-protective” human rights on the children. While I agree that some children are abused with excessive use of rotans or any form of physical punishment – whether the children deserve it or not; but you can’t deny that some form of punishment is necessary for their up-bringing. Since when did a few strokes of rotan or slaps cause one to have “trauma” for the rest of their life? You want to talk trauma, let’s look at rape victims. These victims are robbed out of their trust towards people, self-esteem, self-value and more; yet what do the criminals get (if they were caught at all)? A few ‘lovely’ years spent behind bars with a roof over their head and their needs being taken care off with the public funds, because we need to treat them like humans with rights. How fucked up is that?

Once, China passes a law that states that the parents of a criminal who committed crimes too will be punished by the law – to which many people in China and around the world causes a huge uproar over, as parents can’t be blamed for the wrongs that their children did. I agreed with the idea behind the law, up to a certain degree as I believe that parents are to nurture and teach their children from young – however they can’t exactly be put to blame for all things that their children did. There are good parents, and their kids sometimes gone astray – then who are to be blamed?

The Whites will loathes the Asians’ mentality and strict punishment saying that its inhuman to treat people (regardless of their crime) in sometimes gruesome manner, you can’t really deny the effectiveness it holds over the people. But then again, question on whether it helps or worsens the situation is another discussion altogether as ‘fear’ is not exactly the best solution to anything. Of course, certain laws in some countries are biased and unfair, and that too will be discussed in a separate blog.

Back on the topic, I recall a particular movie about a White man in China, who was accused of committing a murder, was being put on trial. China, being a man-dominated country with no or little respect for women (whether they are capable or not), were being mean especially to the White man’s Chinese female lawyer because 1) she’s a woman, and 2) she’s helping a foreigner in his case. There was an argument between the White man and his lawyer, which he complains or states that “China is being too strict or inhuman in its law, where for crime committed, a huge or heavy penalty awaits its criminals – death for murder, kidnap and such” while supporting USA laws, to which the Chinese lady replied “And yet, the crimes committed here are so much less than those committed in your great country”. He was left speechless then and there. Both parties argues some rather fine points, which further points how some balance in laws (or any other matter) are needed without being an extreme on either end to benefit the people themselves.

Now I shall continue with real-life scenarios in Malaysia, Singapore, China:

Story 5: Sis and I were walking around in the shopping mall while mum went looking for her things. For a brief moment, sis stopped and glared at a Malay kid who just ran off and complained, “That bloody kid KICKED me!”. We didn’t think much of it and continued on. In just a span of a few minutes, this kid came back and KICKED my sis again right in front of me while I shouted, “HEY!” and he giggled and ran off again. At this time, both of us were visibly frustrated and angered. And guess what, this time he came back and he KICKED again (I was on the verge of slapping or kicking him back – I was just about 15 or so, sis was 4 years younger) and HIS MOTHER was just right behind him! I glared at her, she just held on her son who was still kicking my sis at this point and glared back at me and just walked off. Just like that. So much for being a MOTHER. *spit*

Story 6: When I was around 16 years old, I notice that my Chinese neighbor’s son (my age) will bring home his girlfriend (a year or two younger) on any occasion – regardless whether the parents are home or not. Within the same year, this girl moved into the household. Mind you, they are both still schooling. In case you are wondering – yes, the parents allowed the girl to move-in and the father, in fact was so proud of his son that he was literally boasting it out to other neighbors. I don’t get it, if you ask me. But one thing for sure, this area that I’m in has a high rate of underage girls getting pregnant and ended up married and dropped out of school – this is an issue for all races here. I blame these on the parents and teachers for choosing to be ignorant towards this matter and just shrugged their shoulders and said, “They are old enough to know what is right and wrong. Thus, it’s their choice.” How are they supposed to know what they suppose to know when they are not taught on the basis of their action? Telling them it’s wrong to do it without discussing the issue does not sum up to them being educated on it.

Story 7: While I was queuing up to pay to purchase my ticket from the machine in MRT, Singapore – an Indian girl in her teens just jumped right in front of me and started fiddling with the machine. A little stunned, I choose to just ignore the fact that she cuts the queue and allow her to continue. I didn’t see much benefit in making a fuss as I wasn’t in a hurry, and also, I’m not in the mood to screw people up and down. Within seconds, her WHOLE family barged in with the mother, father, brother and a little sister. I was more amused than being angered. “So this is how the parents teach their kids these days,” I said aloud to my friend next to me. Since they were thick-skinned enough to cut my queue, of course they ignore me (or maybe they don’t understand me). Either way, I regretted not taking a picture. It would have made a good story in STOMP or something.

Story 8: When Hong Kong Disneyland opened, my family and aunt’s family (minus the husbands) visits within the year or so. Unfortunately for us, it was filled to the brimmed with China people as it was some special holiday. Lucky for me, the weather is well below zero degree – so no sweaty smells can get its way around. It was the first time for me to meet these China people during their holiday and it’s NOT pleasant at all, to say the least. They were rude, they made a mess by throwing rubbish on the ground (despite bins being provided in every corner), they cut queues, and my list will go on and on. Purpose of this story is to prove that NOT all the Chinese families teach or educate their children like Tiger mum, for if they did, perhaps there will be more well-behaved China people on their holidays. Maybe it’s the culture that we lived in are different, but I was expecting better behave people than those I met. Of course, it’s not only the China peeps. I met some really rude blacks, whites, browns… just shows that it’s more than just the culture, it’s the up-bringing.

I could continue on and on, on this matter alone but I would say I make more than enough arguments or points with such a LONG post written. To summarize the “Tiger Mum vs Tigger Mum” – I would love to have a balance of both. It’s not easy, but nothing is easy after all. Especially in bringing up kids in these days and time.

People and their Talent

I was thinking of just writing about "People and their Voice" since I just written some stuffs on music by the sweet twins, JS. And while I was looking at more and more YouTube videos, I can't help but thinks... why just "voice"? Why not Talent? Therefore, "People and their Talent" it is!

First, let us watched these kids with a big voice!

Liam McNally who looks like just any kid, and start going all opera! (can't embed the video, you can listen to him here in YouTube).

Andrew Johnson is one kid that melt my heart the moment I see him. He seems so timid and all, and his voice is just... unbelievable! He never fails to make me cry :)

And Jackie Evancho. Jackie Jackie Jackie. She's such a sweet little babe, and hearing her voice, it is quite unbelievable.

Shaheen is a handsome young lad with a powerful voice. Simon, was actually quite right for once ;) (Watch here at YouTube).

This handsome young Mongolian boy, Uudam with a great singing skill. You can feel his emotion by listening to him without even understanding the lyrics.

Note: I made my parents cried in public listening to this.

Avery & The Calico Hearts are like Chipettes! Like seriously. Watch and see why!

And now, those small little babes who can rock their body, as well as those intruments!

YiMing Wang (or lovingly known as XiaoBao), a boy who starts dancing like MJ since he's 3-years-old! Cute, cuddly and hey, his movements are as good as any professional! See for yourself:

And he gets the crowd going wild here!

This boy is only 3, his beat is alittle off but hey, it's still awesome!

And this little guy, great drumming skills with a killer smile (he be a lady killer when he's older, I can bet on it) !

This, like my friend say, it's a little creepy somehow... but they are really good!

This 7-years-old is just amazing with the violin! (Watch here at YouTube).

A blind 5-years-old girls plays the piano while singing. Apparently her parents can't bear to bring up a blind child, so they abandon her at a orphan centre. Her current caretakers who adopted her did not know of her talent until she's 3 years-old.

And here this same girl, older now... performing in Singapore!

And here, she's performing with the handsome DBSK boys :)

Now, let's get started with the adults ~

Suleman Mirza is quite a surprise. Creative and interesting. Audiences loved it :)

Sung-bong Choi is a homeless kid with a breath-taking voice with no professional training!

Chris Rene is a really interesting guy, I mean he wrote the lyrics himself... so that's kinda cool.

Landau is a big surprise. With his looks, seriously, you wouldn't think of classic at all. And to think, his voice is perfect for it!

Edward Reid is a seriously funny guy. Like seriously. Who would have thought of using the latest music and mix it with the children lullaby's lyrics? (Watch here at YouTube).

Dani Shay is just cute cute cute and best of all, she know how to use humor!

Susan Boyle is a real surprise... even my mum's eyes kinda popped :P (Watch here at YouTube).

And Paul Potts is like another version of Susan. A surprise as well. (Watch here at YouTube). You can see all the judges' bored faces. I bet they were thinking, "Here we go again (groans)."

Liu Wei, a talented disabled guy who plays the piano with his toes!

And this girl, who has no finger in one hand plays the piano really well too :)

And now... these ladies really surprise you with their voice. Super serious on this. A MUST WATCH!

A talent show in Thailand, it shows a beautiful lady heading towards the stage singing the sweetest way possible... but is that ONLY it?

This chinese lady, Pan QianQian here, can really belt out great songs like its original... and its all sung by famous MALE singers.

Compiling all these are sure hardwork in its own way :) Enjoy!

Sweet Sweet Music by JS

Oh man, I seriously LOVE Janice and Sonia. Can't ever forget the first time I watched their YOUTUBE video (recommended by a fellow friend who become an instant fan of theirs)! Them being so sweet-looking with such lovely voice, it's hard not to be blown away! And the fact is both of them are twins, make it even more amazing! They really complement each other really well :)

Another friend, who happens to be a great fan of Korean artists (especially girls, of course) literally follows their progress. So yeah, I always get free updates so that is pretty cool too!

Was reading a friend's blog about them (check it out at www.PrakashDaniel.com) and yeah, he had actually meet these lovely ladies when they were in town last year. I'm jealous of him, BIG TIME. And him being a talented guy as he is, this video is shot by him and friend, Ruben and edited by Jin ;)

Anyway, thought of sharing their other videos as well :) Listening to them will definitely bring a smile!

Kinda waiting for them to release an album (or maybe they did? gotta check...) so I can go to sleep just listening to these ladies :)

"Why I Told My Daughter to Quit Her Job" by Holly Robinson

My daughter called me last night to celebrate her news. "I got the job!" she said. "I'm going to be decorating cupcakes!"

I cheered. My daughter earned an honors degree in Natural Resources from a major university this past May. This is the happiest I've heard her sound in months.

You think that you know where this blog post is going: oh, no, another parent bemoaning the fact that our nation's newly minted college graduates can't find decent jobs! And why wouldn't you think that? New books like Slouching Toward Adulthood: Observations from the Not-So-Empty Nest are rolling off the presses daily to explain the "shocking truth" behind the fact that 5.9 million people between the ages of 25 and 35 are now living with their parents.

But you would be wrong. This is a very different rant.

My daughter is the poster child for why college matters. She went to a decent suburban high school, finished in the top quarter of her class, played varsity sports. Attending a state university allowed her to continue expanding her intellectual and social horizons. She worked closely with researchers in Natural Resources, learned Spanish, studied and worked abroad, explored electives that enriched her perspective. She continually added to her resume, too, always building toward her post-graduation dream of working as a scientist.

She did everything right, and lo and behold, the system worked. She landed a job with a West Coast environmental engineering company that paid her more money than she had ever dreamed of making right out of college. Hurray!

Slowly, though, things unraveled. My daughter loved living near San Francisco, but even on her hefty salary, she could only afford an apartment in a dire section of Oakland, which led to her being caught in the middle of a mini gang shootout. (She has a nasty bullet wound on her car to prove it.) Meanwhile, her spiffy new job bored her, and her bosses were often negative, even mean-spirited.

For months, she stuck it out. Her student loans were about to kick in and this job paid double what any of her friends were making, plus benefits. As time passed, though, my sunny girl grew more despondent. Every day, she dragged herself into work. And, every day, things didn't get better.

She started looking for work. In California, the unemployment rate is dire -- 11.3 percent, compared to 8.6 percent nationwide as of November 2011. One of her job interviews for a coffee company required four different interviews, plus test taking. My daughter got the job and was thrilled, especially because the position includes health benefits. But the pay was abysmal: minimum wage.

Did she really want to leave her posh job for minimum wage? How could she -- a driven student, a hard worker, a young woman who had always set goals and reached them -- possibly justify making that leap?

There wasn't any rational reason for her to quit. But there was every emotional reason to do so.

"Life is too short to be miserable for money," I told her finally. "Just quit. Take the barista job and figure out something else while you're making lattes."

I can hear the gasps of horror from most parents out there. How could I advise my daughter to join the ranks of the marginally employed, after our family invested so much into her college degree?

Easily. College, you see, is not really about preparing you for the job market. It's about gaining the knowledge and skills you need to seize opportunities -- and that includes knowing when to walk away from something that makes you unhappy.

There's a lot of talk these days -- well, all days, I suppose -- about what good it is to get a liberal arts degree, what majors are most likely to lead to the best-paid and most stable careers, and the importance of building your resume while you're in school so that you have an edge when it's time to enter the almighty job race.

That's all true, mostly. Obviously, you have to eat. But maybe the goal of college shouldn't be so closely linked to employment. Actual life isn't that different from the game of Life, in the sense that there's a point where at the start we all have to choose the college path or the career path. You can earn the same money either way, and the same good (or bad) spins on the dial can send you into a tailspin of debt or misery: illness, accidents, divorce, tornadoes taking your house. College is no guarantee that you'll be rich, or even middle class. In fact, there are some arguments that suggest technical training is a better bang for the buck.

(A handy example: my younger brother never finished his four-year college degree, yet he makes ten times more money than my other brother and I do, and we both have master's degrees.)

College, if you're lucky enough to get there, is really about figuring out your friends and your values as well as your dreams for the future. Nobody -- well, almost nobody -- finds a top-paying position right out of college. Most of us have to pay our dues and climb a dozen different career ladders before we find one that has rungs we can reach -- and a place at the top with a view that suits us. If you land that seemingly "perfect" job with a salary worth boasting about, but then you hate it and are afraid to quit, your wings are clipped. That "safe" job will kill your creativity, drown your enthusiasm, and smother your ability to get up in the morning with a bounce in your step. Why stay?

The answer most people give is "fear." We've all heard the unemployment statistics.

But let's turn those around. The unemployment rate is high -- even upwards of 12 percent in certain U.S. cities. But that means that 88 percent of people have jobs. Can they make a living on their wages? That depends on how you define a "living." Maybe you don't need a new car, or a car at all. Maybe you can find a seasonal rental or roommates.

Jobs are like college courses. Each one you take teaches you a set of new skills and offers a fresh perspective on life. They aren't meant to be permanent, most of them. They are only stepping stones.

In my daughter's case, the barista job led her to have enough free hours to do what she really loves: draw comics. She's thinking about publishing her comics online. In her free time, she also happened to stop by a new gourmet cupcake store, where she chatted with the enthusiastic owner and was hired to decorate cupcakes and work the counter. Again, it's not much money, but combined with the coffee place, it's enough for her to scrape by. Meanwhile, she has moved out of Oakland and into an affordable room in a house near the beach in Santa Cruz. She's happily experimenting with cupcake flavors and thinking about helping this new business owner with social media and marketing. She is learning something new every day. Life is good.

When you quit a job, any job, it can be terrifying. But it's also exhilarating, as you open yourself to new possibilities. So go ahead. Take the risk. Quit that job, if you hate it. You might surprise yourself. -

The moment I read this article, it's although it's speaking of my life. Many things resonates what I've went through.

My first job is with a well-known media company, with really decent for those newly graduates with good benefits. I was happy in the beginning. I enjoyed my job tremendously. Always going-out of my way to hit my targets, to get things down. Then things went downhill, with the company's culture as well as my relationship with my manager. One thing led to another, being extremely unhappy, I rant to my parents saying I want to quit. They advised me against it, like any parents will. I stick-on for more than a year. Family and friends saw me changes from a bubbly happy girl to a conscious, careful and quiet person. Every morning, I cried myself awake and drag myself to work. If I just feel a little unwell, I'll take the excuse to see the doctor and get a leave. Everyday at work, I sent SMS-es to my colleagues that "I want to die" whenever issues surface. Every night, I'll just lock myself in my room and cry myself to sleep. It was pretty bad, I was depressed with life. Can you imagine how silly, that I wanted to kill myself over work? And finally, instead of asking my parents' opinion, I just told them that I am quitting this job. I don't need advice anymore. I just can't stand living my life that way. And I went to another lower-paying job. From then, I could not stick to any job in particular for more than 6-months! I realized my attitudes causes it, one way or another, and also, because I just want to "eliminate" things that I don't want from my life. Whenever I realized what's wrong and there's nothing that I could do to change things, I just packed and leave. Those who are reading this will definitely say that I lack of perseverance. Which is true, I agree. Yet I will tell you that, it's also because I know that there are more to life than just sticking your gut in something, to just pay bills. I'm very lucky, privilege. I know. Then again, I'm young and single with not much worry for life, if I do not take my chances now, when shall I start taking a leap of faith? When I'm 30s and above? When I'm married, with children? When I own a house and need to pay bills and more bills? I rather take my chance now, than later.

**I'm sorry that this post turned out, rather awful looking. I have no idea how to remove the white thingy! Just bear it!